People struggle to figure out what they want out of life, but deep down inside, they know what they want. They’re just too scared to go after it.
That’s ok though. It might take you some time to understand yourself and how you intend to go after your dream. Sometimes it’s not feasible to chase your passion either.
If you live in a small-ass town and are still finishing up your high school diploma, you probably won’t be able to leave your city and join a band on account of your parents stopping you.
Always do what you genuinely want to do, even if you think it’s not the “smartest” option. The decision a person thinks is the safest is typically the worst for them.
For instance, post-secondary was a bad decision looking back on it now. I looked at it as a “back-up” plan. Hilarious, I know, because we all know that a University degree – with some exceptions – is utterly useless.
I would’ve been better off to go to school for audio engineering like I initially planned. I should’ve just chased what I was passionate about at the time. I let people bring me down.
I went on to obsess about something else. I used my time there as a means of working on, what I considered at the time, more important things.
It gave me the confidence to pursue what I want in life. It’s possible for you to get what you want.
I guess things fall into place for a reason. When I was 18-years-old, I was just too immature to understand what I wanted and how to go about it.
I didn’t have the self-confidence to pursue what I wanted, and I didn’t have the experience nor the intelligence to keep myself out of trouble.
My fascination with drugs when I was a teenager seems so lame to me now. It was a form of rebelling against what I thought was the hypocrisy of society. Cheesy AF.
I once read that doing what you want at every moment is the key to not experiencing regret. I think that’s probably a great a way to live life.
Last year, I was talking with one of my co-workers and he told me a story about one of his friends.
His friend, who is probably 60-70-years-old now, was in a band at the time in his early twenties and his friends wanted to travel to California to pursue a career in music.
However, his father convinced him not to go to LA because it was a “stupid dream” and he should focus on something that’s more stable and realistic.
In the end, he regretted the choice because his friends and his band went on to have a decent career in the music industry, while he stayed behind regretting every moment of it.
People sometimes choose not to pursue their dreams out of fear, or even ignorance.
When I was younger, I would always think about how capitalism, consumerism, and materialism were the causes of all the world’s problems. I think it may have been just fear of the fact that I couldn’t live up to societies standards or expectations.
It was lame. I purposefully made myself look as clueless as possible because that was my identity.
I wanted to be an outcast like I didn’t belong in the world. I resented every person around me because I couldn’t understand that I’m part of the problem as well, and it isn’t just “others.”
I constantly externalized the blame outside of myself rather than keeping quiet, humble, and not lecturing people about how they should live their lives.
Nowadays, I would become the change in the world that I would want to see in others, without really saying anything about it, which brings me to my next point regarding personal responsibility.
Last night, I was watching a show on Netflix called, “BoJack Horseman,” which has been alright so far, minus the mediocre writing. I’ve noticed how a lot of these shows always have one character who is a “woke feminist” or whatever you want to call them.
They’re on the show to talk about “patriarchy” and the “male gaze” and how capitalism ruins everything. The character last night is a girl with glasses, but I forget her name.
She talks about how one of the girls is a product of the “environment” and how it isn’t her fault because she’s just trying to succeed in a male-dominated society. The use of sexuality is her only way of doing so, according to the hipster-feminist anyway.
BoJack, in response, relishes in what she said because he goes on a rant essentially saying, “Great, everything is society’s fault. We’re all a product of our environment so anytime we do something bad, it’s someone else’s fault. None of our actions have consequences because its society’s doing and not my own.”
I’m paraphrasing, but this captures the gist of what he said. I’ve never heard a TV show address that argument before.
People who write for TV shows and movies usually are “liberal,” – or the new definition of “liberal” – so they typically blame all of societies problems on things that are outside of their control.
Some of the blame goes to concepts and institutions like capitalism, corporations, the government, patriarchy, social norms, celebrity culture, consumerism, materialism, racism, sexism, homophobia, xenophobia, and so on and so forth.
They never actually acknowledge the fact that people have choices.
About a month ago, I was reading an article from an actress named Kaitlyn Doubleday – I think that was her name. She admits to going up to Harvey Weinstein’s room and sleeping with him or whatever for a movie role.
It was an honestly ridiculous article.
She said it was societies fault for “grooming” a young woman into believing that she needs to appease a powerful man to be successful.
So rather than ignoring his messages and trying to work with an alternative producer who doesn’t expect sexual favors, she instead chose Weinstein and texted back and forth with him over the course of a few months. And even better, it is society’s fault for her doing so.
I would strongly suggest against being like one of these people. However, she makes millions of dollars a year probably and is famous, so I can’t judge, can I?
Either way, it’s best to take responsibility for the things that you do in life, and not blame outside forces.
If you’re wondering how to figure out what it is that you want to do, look back at your childhood.
It’s weird how a person’s perception of the world changes as time passes. One day you could be consumed by guitar playing and two years after it’s hip-hop.
The interests you have as a child are much closer to what you want out of life than you might think.
In Robert Greene’s Mastery, he says precisely that. According to Greene, when kids are first coming up in the world, if they like something – whatever it may be – they genuinely appreciate it and enjoy it at its core. They don’t care if it’s “popular” or approved by the mainstream.
However, as time passes, their youthful enthusiasm slowly disappears, and they begin to make decisions which they think please others more than themselves.
You might be trying to please your demanding parents or what have you. Or maybe you’re even scared of being thought of as a loser by people from your hometown.
This is a common one. I know a girl who felt lost after graduating University and ended up becoming a lawyer. She wasn’t really passionate about it; she was more interested in helping victims of abuse and working in harm-reduction programs for substances abusers.
However, there isn’t a lot of money in that, and there isn’t much status in it either. Being a lawyer is probably one of the most overrated occupations.
It seems like when people pursue that path, they’re not actually interested in becoming a defender of individual rights. It’s more about status.
People who are passionate about law want to defend individuals, not work as the defense attorney of pharmaceutical and insurance companies.
If you’re a young kid and your passion is creating music, you might decide after graduating high school that it would be more “feasible” and “realistic” to study accounting instead.
That is wrong. That will be a wrong decision.
It would’ve been better just to pursue your dream in the first place because guess what? If your passion isn’t accounting, you’re going to half-ass it every single day in class and hate your life. Choose something which inspires you to work.